When did I get so busy?

My wife and I were talking the other day I realized something: I’m so freakin’ busy!

I don’t know how it happened but I’m really busy. If a friend wants to hang out with me, they basically have to call me and set a date a month in advanced. That’s so weird. And here is the thing that makes is kind of scary, I don’t feel busy. I feel like my life is going at a good pace, that things are moving along fine. Is that normal?

Anyway, I got to thinking (which is always an interesting adventure) and I realized that if my life is not in constant motion I get board. With out work, the Belles, random weekend trips for things I have to do, I would sit at home and be board. So I asked myself why that is and I figured it out. Money.

I’m so glad to finally have a job that lets me pay the bills. It not only pays the bills but lets me do a few cool things as well. For instance, my friend Clifton asked me to be in his wedding and I said yes months ago. I found out latter that the wedding was in the Salinas area, about three hundred miles away from where I live. I was able to pay for the gas (320 miles round trip) for my car, the hotel stay, and all the other random expenses it took to get my wife and I there and back. Yes we had to be careful with money because of this trip, but we did not have to worry about food, Rent, or gas money for the things we do. This is a first in a long time for my wife and I.

How does that have anything to do with why I am busy? Well, when you don’t have money, and you live in the LA area (I’m sure it is the same else where too) there is not much you can do. You can’t really stay at home during the summer because it costs too much to pay for the electric bill (about $80 a month for a one bedroom apartment). You can’t go to places like Starbucks to beat the heat, because you need to save the money for food or gas. So you end up staying busy with work or going places with people. I’m certain of it.

Now that I have a little money, I have just enough to not need to worry but not enough to do the things I want. I would like to get my car working so it can pass the smog inspection for DMV, however I can afford to stop and get Chinese food if I don’t feel like cooking. I would like to be able to afford health insurance for both my wife and I, but I can support both of us in the sate we are currently in. And I find myself reflecting on the times when we had even less money and being thankful for what we have, even if it is followed by that feeling that we are not quite where we want to be.

So here is my solution. I need to win The Lottery. That way I can pay off all my debt, afford to buy a house for my wife and I that is still In California, pay for my wife to have medical coverage, get us each cars that we don’t have to be afraid of having random mechanical problems, and dedicate our lives to the things we love to do. We could both go back to school and finish our respective degrees, and put enough money aside in investments to live a comfortable life. I’d want to be that guy that no one knows is rich unless they get to know him, who is quite about the money he gives to people and organization, and stays down to earth. If that happened, then I would not have to stay busy to keep my mind of what I don’t have. Then I could actually spend time writing my stories, learning to play new folk instruments and songs, and maybe even spend more time with the people in my life that matter with out having to make an appointment weeks in advance.

Or I could just be rambling…I think we all dream of something like this happening. Honestly, I would be happy with being able to my wife happy, and having a family of my own that I don’t have to worry about feeding and clothing. Is that too much to ask for? I don’t think so.


~ by trinity777 on July 12, 2007.

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